Our lives as students in Bowen university are
stereotyped…I mean, one wakes up in the morning knowing fully well the next
couple of hours are to be spent in a classroom..acquiring knowledge. Then
breaks rotate round having lunch, cancelled or postponed classes…chapel
torturing sessions and then…evenings.
Free time in this context is limited within
the hours of 4 - 8:45pm. This is the only period our chains of conformity are
released…just for a while. Now, everyone grabs a partner, it’s a do or die
affair, nobody wants to be found in need or alone..those excluded from this
‘bonding exercise’ are students in various chapel units; the choir especially...but is for a period of time.The
engaged ones linger around before settling down in abode of genuine expressions
(secretive corners)… here, warm love from the females are exchanged for cold
bodies from the males in return. I’ll be nice enough to explain this one…I’m
blunt like that!
It’s simple, girls want attention from boys
who succumb and receive pleasure in return to feed their hungry (horny) bodies.
Love has varying meanings to different individuals. Perhaps, it’s
because of family background and upbringing… I really do not know other
perceptions of love, but I recognize the familiar feeling and I know it to be
same…unchanging, no matter its presentation.
What I still fail to understand is how and
why people have doubts in mind when love’s looking them not only in the face
but eyeball to eyeball. Come on people! Being bias isn’t the way forward…not at
all. When sullen towards love, you end up on the fence… belonging nowhere,
that’s really not life. True talk!
Gullibility stands to rule in decision making for some students who
depend on friends for everything, even dating. Trust me! It’s hilarious.
A guy really likes a girl but won’t ask her
out because his best pals don’t approve her. More like an initiation process
for the girl in ‘fitting in’. First, she has to introduce herself and find out
names of ‘bae’s’ friends, engage in boring long or unnecessary short
conversations hovering on likes, dislikes or even past relationship, depending
on whom is engaged in conversing with the girl. Most times, the ‘grading
session’ takes place when she’s introduced.
By grading session, I mean when the girl is
thoroughly looked at.
She’s examined for flaws or physical
shortcomings in aspects of endowment and eloquence…
All these frolicking by guys is an act of comic relief...the best part
comes when she’s assessed after departing. This leaves the boy in ‘like’
(because it’s definitely not love) questioning his hunch and finalising getting or losing
her.
Woe betides the girl if she’s had a fling
or ‘side affair’ with any of his friends…the last card’s been played then
because she’d be seen as an object of scorn.
In
Bowen, love’s ‘quadrangle’ is between the boy, his girlfriend, a side chick and
a whore. The girlfriend is the ‘supposed’ love of his life, the side chick is
present for guilty pleasures all the time and the whore is to fill in gaps from
both girlfriend and side chick as well as playing with his friends…
Misconceptions have been developed over the years about real
relationships and what they are truly about.
Relationships to most teenagers and young
adults these days dwell majorly on sex and foreplay…satisfying their wants and
needs; Learning economics in secondary school sure isn’t paying off now because
differentiation of wants from needs seems to be a herculean task.
To them, it’s the ‘in- thing’ and everyone
wants a piece with him or her, following the crowd and ignoring self-makeup.
Some students in Bowen don’t consider their
ideal in school and in academics..
It’s disheartening knowing fully well
students engage in the fun and excitement that comes with socializing which is
not a bad idea; the bad idea now is them doing the wrong things because it’s
believed to be the right thing to do.
Anyways, I’m not writing to preach or
impose morality on anyone…it’s simply my personal discretion and opinion
shared.
Bowen University as a foundation with set motives
in minds of students has gone a long way in bringing back lost students who
have forgotten their primary purpose in school.
Heading back to my focus on evenings in
school and how it’s spent, I remember mentioning abode of genuine expressions
earlier on. What I’m referring to is the secretive corners couples get to
express their ‘love’ for each other… at least away from preying eyes of
courtesy officers (who stand as protectors of moral standards in school) for a
while. These sites are the classrooms that are void of intellectual sessions,
gossip chairs, balconies of the chemistry, biology and physics laboratories;
sidewalks of faculty buildings and behind cars parked in alleys.
My goodness! It’s real clumsy of me to
forget the field and trees in school. Everyone just has a spot.
I often wonder why people fall in and out of “love”.
It took me a while to figure this out but
the last puzzle piece was fixed when my girlfriend came explaining to me in
profound glee that she ‘thinks’ she’s in love.
Quite sudden and alarming that was…when she
asked, and I speak as the horse’s mouth; “Uzochi! Have you seen his mad shoes?
His dress sense is on point and he has style”.
“WOAH!!! Nice one sister, nice one!” was
all I said inwardly.
In
school, even outside the four walls of the university nowadays, love has criteria.
If an individual is seen lacking fashion
style, a good accent, beauty, good body physique, ego, riches…he or she isn’t
even considered an option.
Honestly to me, love is beautiful, true,
unselfish and respectful…notwithstanding all I’ve written above, I’d love
someone truly one day and I may or may not have a sincere love story…there will
be one anyway.
#KOSISOCHUKWU™
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